I have been away from this blog for a while. One of the reasons was that I was in the final rounds of writing a book together with Shirly Ronen-Harel (author of “Agile Kids”): “The Coaching Booster – Coaching with Agile and Lean Methods”. It’s finished now, and as a teaser I want to share some hacks from the empowerment chapter with you.
- Act “as if” you are empowered already to begin your process of self-empowerment. Sometimes a lack of empowerment in reality is that you do not know how much you already have. Once you start to challenge your perceived limits you may discover that the boundaries are not as narrow as you thought. Read more about the “As-If Principle” in the book by Richard Wiseman with that title.
- Don’t say “I must …” – say “I want to … because …”. This hack is an application of the ideas of nonviolent communication, a concept developed by Marshall Rosenberg. Like “I can’t …”, this is about finding value in things.
- Don’t say “I can’t …” if you really mean “I don’t want …”. Surely there are things one cannot do. But very often “I can’t …” means that you do not want to learn something. Be honest with yourself, you have the right not to want everything that is possible.
- Learn to say “No” – but in a constructive manner, offering alternatives. If you say “Yes” to everybody and everything, you lose focus on what is important for you and your progress.
- Don’t speak or think derogatively about yourself. Homer Simpson’s “d’oh” is like the archetype of this. When you say “That was stupid” or “I’m stupid” you will limit yourself just like Homer does in the “The Simpsons.” Instead, ask yourself “What can I learn from that?”, thus triggering continuous improvement.
- Identify and quit self-destructive behavior. Procrastination is a good example: The constant heartbeat approach (described in the chapter about “Constant heartbeat”) we describe in this Booster is a good way to overcome it. Other self-destructive behaviors will be closely linked to waste, so waste identification will also help you to find them.
- Empower others. Others deserve empowerment, too. As said above, empowerment has a strong social element. When you start to empower others, this can give you instant gratification. Empowering others means you have enough power to share. (Just be sure that by empowering others you don’t undermine your own priorities.)
I hope you like these hacks and have a closer look at the or Coaching Booster.